Saturday, January 2, 2021

RECOMMENDATIONS

"Good morning, Bear .  How's it going?" asked Bum.

"It hasn't been going, Bum, as you well know," said Bear and he looked very annoyed.

"Whatever do you mean, Bear?"

"Where have you been?" asked Bear and he still looks annoyed.

"I am so sorry, Bear, to have left you by yourself for such a long time," said Bum.

"Sorry doesn't cut it Bum.  If you wanted to dump me, why didn't you just come out with it?"

"I don't dump my friends Bear.  I had my reasons for not being in touch."

"Let's hear them" said Bear.

"The last time we spoke was the end of June.  It was then I realized that the fucking pandemic was not gearing down but rather up."

"So?" questioned Bear.

"I contracted the fucking pandemic fatigue and depression.  At first, I didn't realize what my fucking problem was.  I was always fucking tired and only had the fucking strength to watch fucking TV, even during the fucking day."

 "Hold it right there Bum.  Do you realize that you have used that fucking word six times in that last rant?" said Bear in a very disapproving tone.

"I apologize Bear.  I know just how much you disapprove of needless cursing.  But, and I know you don't like sentences that start with but, I find myself cursing a lot since I got older and the fucking pandemic didn't help.  So there!"

 "That's not much of a fucking apology Bum, if you don't mind my saying so." 

"My apologies again, dear Bear.  Let's change the subject before we deteriorate any further."

"What do you mean, we?" muttered Bear.

"That's the Royal we Bear," said Bum.

 "We are not Royal, Bum  You are certainly not the Queen and I'm no bloody Prince Phillip." responded Bear.  

"It's only a common phrase, Bear.  It's nothing to get uptight about," said Bum, looking exasperated.

"Common is right, Bum, and not one I like.  Let's go over Recommendations from Paul's Analysis Report before we forget what we're meeting for."

"OK, Paul said taking the "middle path" would involve some effort to whip the story into shape, but the result will be a more complete and, hopefully, more salable book.  On the other hand, you may not want to put that much work into it.  You may be looking just to clean it up, put a cover on it, and send it out there.  If so, that's fair enough: you're the author and the publisher.  Only you know how much effort you're willing to put into it, and you should  be realistic about that."

"Wait just a minute, Bum.  We've already covered that "middle path" stuff.  Wasn't that explained earlier under the heading Possible Strategies?"

"Wow, Bear, your memory is better than mine.  I am impressed."  Bum clapped her admiration.  

"Never mind all that crap, Bum.  Did Paul have anything else to say?"

He said he can help with getting the book polished and formatted into e-book files.  He can also probably help with arranging the cover art (there are fairly low-cost online service providers for things like this), and also help with the actual publishing process, sending the book through Amazon and Smashwords.

Bear thought a moment, digesting this information I suppose, before saying, "I prefer a real book."

"Me too," said Bum. 

"Did you let Paul know that you did not want an e-book for our book?" asked Bear.

"No."

"Why not?" asked Bear, and he looked puzzled.

"I don't know."

 "Why not?"

"I don't want to hurt his feelings, if I can avoid that.  Paul has worked hard at organizing an e-book publication and all the bits and pieces needed to make it work." said Bum. 

"He'll get over it," said Bear.

"That's a very hurtful thing to say, Bear, and totally not like you."

"He'll get over it," repeated Bear. 

"Saying it twice doesn't make it more acceptable, Bear," admonished Bum.

"There are three of us involved here Bum.  There's you who would be hurt by an e-book, there's me who would be hurt too because you know I want a real book.  And then there's Paul who you think might be hurt.  Two out of three wins, I say.  What's he got to be hurt about?  It's not his book, he's only the editor."

"OK, Bear.  I'll tell him," said Bum, giving in without much of a fight. 

"Good," said Bear.  "Where were we with this Recommendations stuff that Paul wrote?"

"He said the cover art will cost money, but maybe not much, and that I might be able to get something decent for $100 or so, maybe less."

"We've got our pictures front and back that your niece Mara drew, and very nice they are too, although my picture could've been bigger."

"I told you in an earlier blog post Bear, that my picture has to be bigger.  How can you, a dog, be bigger than I, or should that be me?"

"Who cares?  I know it's you, and OK, I get it," said Bear.  "What else did Paul say under his Recommendations?  He tends to run on a bit doesn't he?"

"I don't call analyzing all aspects of publishing a book as running on a bit," said Bum disapprovingly. 

"I'm sorry, if you're reading this post Paul.  Now Bum, what else did he say about Recommendations?"

"He said that promoting the book will also involve expense and effort, but as for how much, that's up to me  It's considered normal and essential for an author to have a website, for instance.  That will take some effort by somebody.  He said he found an interesting website called itch.io that functions as a kind of online mall for creators, through which one can sell one's works.  We could maybe set up a simple storefront there, and the site enables you to sell digital copies of your work, using an online payment facility called Stripe.  He plans to set up a storefront there himself, so he might be able to pioneer the way and then, if it seems to work well, get one set up for me too.  You probably don't have to pay anything to set up there.  They probably take a percentage of any sales." 

"This is useless information, Bum, since we are not going digital with our book, wouldn't you agree?" said Bear.

"Yes," said Bum. 

"Is that it with Paul's recommendations?"

"No,"said Bum, "there's more.  He said there are things like review services, which cost money.  By paying a certain amount, you can get a certain number of reviews for your book posted to Goodreads or to Amazon."

"That's all very good, Bum, but, sitnce Paul continues to lag on the editing of our book, a review package is the last thing we need," muttered Bear. 

"Noted, oh grumpy one.  The last thing Paul said was that the most important promotional tool is the online mailing list.  This is a list that you build up and to whom you send occasional messages.  This is a long process, and does require a website--a place where people can sign up.  This list becomes your core audience.  With all his efforts and fame, his own list now has 67 people on it, but if you are looking to sell books, you want to have a list with thousands of people on it.  It's a real uphill climb."

"Hold it right there, Bum.  How long has Paul had his website?  Many years I'm thinking and he only has 67 people?  Give me a break."

"Paul did say that all these things are daunting.  But then, they're not actually obligatory:  you don't have to do any of them.  It all depends on how badly you want to sell books.  You can send them out there and just leave them.  But with a thousand books being published each day, and most of them being promoted somehow or other, how is yours going to be noticed?  Book sales in general are hard to come by."

"This is my last word on Paul's Recommendations.  They are moot unless our book is out there published."

"Moot? What does that mean?" asked Bum, looking puzzled.

"Look it up.  I won't always be around to decipher this stuff."

"I'm glad this year is almost over, Bear.  Nothing good happened in December except it's almost over.  To top it off, my old friend Bill died December 6th, and the month deteriorated after that."

"Bill Stockmann?" asked Bear.

"Yes," said Bum.  "His heart failed him."

"I am so very sorry Bum, for you and your sister.  I know you three were good buddies."

"Frances wrote a lovely piece about Bill.  I'll read it to you tomorrow."    

 

 

 

 

 

 


 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

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